Why just steal what’s on the porch when you can take the whole thing? Man literally steals house’s porch.

There are porch pirates that steal thins off of porches. Then there are porch pirates that just steal the whole porch. It’s called working smarter, not harder, or Yarrr-der. Get it, “Yar”? Pirate. No, you shut up.

Robin Swanger from Arnco, Georgia picked up his neighbor’s entire 8 foot by 10 foot porch and took off with it. This, even though there were multiple “No Trespassing” signs warning people off the lawn and away from the porch. They were even the good kind you can get at hardware stores with the large. Bold lettering. Although, I get the feeling that reading isn’t a string suit for Robin.

By the way, the porch was apparently the only thing on the neighbor’s land. The house had been taken away for some reason, but they left an 8 foot by 10 foot porch sitting there all by itself. I’m guessing Robin didn’t think anyone would notice.

The porch is valued at $3,000 and Swanger has been charged with felony theft.